The Puppy Resolutions #3: Learn to be alone.

Learning from our mistake of never leaving the puppy by herself.

We left our first puppy alone….never. It was full on attachment parenting.

Here was a typical schedule:

4 am: wake up next to puppy
6 am: morning potty walk with puppy
8 am: training session with puppy 
9 am: nap with puppy (because you've both been up 5 hours already)
10 am: beach trip with puppy
12 pm: lunch with puppy
1 pm: another nap with puppy (you could both go to bed at this point)
2  pm: walk downtown with puppy
5 pm : dinner with puppy
6 pm: evening potty walk with puppy
7 pm: fall asleep on couch with puppy ( it feels like 2 am)
9 pm: go to bed next to puppy

We were very smug about being such great puppy parents. The neighbors who left the dog alone to bark its head off for hours? Not us! The friends who left the dog in the crate to go out for a nice dinner? Not us! The parents who both attended their daughter’s musical and left the dogs at home? Not us! We took turns going to her show.

We got nothing done because the puppy never learned how to be alone. When we attempted to leave her in her pen to make dinner or, god forbid, work our actual jobs to keep her in the kibble, she lost her stuffing. So we didn’t chance it.

When a long awaited movie came to the theater, one person stayed home. When the family wanted to eat out, one person stayed home. When it was karaoke night at a friend’s house, one person stayed home.

Finally, when the dog was two years old, my husband left town for ten days. Something inside me snapped. I just couldn’t be with the dog 24-7, so I installed a puppy camera and left her alone every single day. An hour while I swam at the pool. An hour when I ran to the store. A half hour when I visited a friend. And guess what? She was fine. She whined a bit, sometimes even barked for five minutes, but then settled down with a big sigh at the back door to wait for my return.

I wish we had done this a long time ago. The dog learns that you leave and come back and the human gets to have a life. There is much less resentment from spouses and children and friends when you aren’t mutating your life around the dog. Now that we have a second dog, we are determined to start early in teaching her how to be alone.

Of course, the new puppy will never be completely alone. She has her big sister to keep her company when the humans leave. And that is a whole other problem.